Cameron Teone's Top 10 Mistakes When Approaching Women... 

Cameron Teone

Are you able to approach attractive women consistently and grab their attention?

Let’s face it: Most men are clueless when it comes to approaching women and they make a lot of costly mistakes. Are you making these same mistakes? If you are, I can almost guarantee that it’s turning away women you could be DATING right NOW.

Keep in mind that I am writing this article for the average looking guy. If you have Brad Pitt looks and the body of Adonis, you could make some minor mistakes, and get away with them, as you’d have more flexibility and room for error.

There are a lot of mistakes men repeatedly make upon first approaching women and the following is a list of the top 10:

Approaching Women Mistake 1 - Interrogation

Approaching women and asking too many rapid fire questions, "What do you do? Come here often? What do you study? Where do you normally hang out? Was Colonel Sanders really a military colonel?”

This is trying too hard to establish rapport and if you’re an attractive woman who is hit on 20 times a day, it becomes plain boring conversation after a while.

It’s fine ask a couple of questions in the proper context, and these may vary based on the circumstances, but playing a game of 20 questions is almost a sure way to get yourself blown out.

Approaching Women Mistake 2 - Poor Body Language

Poor body language and poor demeanor. This includes leaning in, groping too fast, not smiling, and touching her awkwardly, which will creep her out.

While carrying yourself in a confident demeanor will help attract her to you, the opposite also holds true. Poor body language makes a person appear needy and desperate.

Approaching Women Mistake 3 - Over Complimenting

Paying her too many compliments. If you’re kissing ass, you’re blowing your chances. That’s as simple as you can get. You can forget the dear-Abbey advice that tells you to walk up to her and kiss her ass. That advice and $3.85 will get you a cup of cappuccino these days. And by the way, guess what, if she is truly a knockout, she knows it.

Do you walk up to Bill Gates and say, “Hey man, you’re rich! That’s cool!” He knows. If you're going to pay a compliment, make sure it's a deserved one. Please stay away from creepy compliments, “Nice legs, nice butt, nice curves.” Those types of compliments at best will get you a polite “Thank You” and at worst will creep her out.

Approaching Women Mistake 4 - Not Smiling

This one isn’t a complete mistake as it may not necessarily blow your chance. However, a friendly smile or even a smirk will go a long way in making her feel more at ease. Plus smiling displays confidence and that’s attractive. More on that later.

Approaching Women Mistake 5 - Offering to buy her a drink

Again, it’s not going to necessarily blow your chances, but you’re wasting your money. Take out that 10 dollar bill and use it as a piece of toilet paper because that’s what you’re doing when your opening line is, “Can I buy you a drink?”

Plus it puts her in an awkward position. Let’s say she is actually a cool girl who just isn’t interested for whatever reason at that moment. If she refuses your free drink, now she’ll be perceived as a bitch who turned down your generous offer. If she takes your offer, now she feels like she has an obligation to entertain you for a period of time.

You would have been much better off just having a nice conversation with her. (And I am not even delving into the gold-diggers who prey on suckers and chumps to buy them free drinks all night, every single time they go out.)

Approaching Women Mistake 6 - Self-Deprecating Humor

Self-deprecating humor is not attractive. Unless you’re a cool, suave, confident motherf***er, stay away from this. For the average guy, this makes you look insecure. Neurotic Woody Allen humor might get you laughs, but they’ll be in conjunction with bits of sympathy. She’ll probably never feel attraction for you.

Approaching Women Mistake 7 - Being Pre-Disqualified

If you’re at a bar/night club, and you’re standing around HOVERING around certain girls just ogling at them, they will notice. Know that women have stronger intuition than you, and they know you’re there. Trust me on this, even if they are not looking at you, they know of your existence.

If you are hovering around for no reason, and/or standing in a corner just gawking at the girls, you’re pre-disqualified. You’ve already been written off like an end of the year bad business expense. When you do finally approach, no matter how great you think you’re opening line is, you’re climbing an uphill battle.

Approaching Women Mistake 8 - Mundane Conversation

Talking about one subject the whole time. So you started a conversation, it’s going well, and you’re having a nice dialogue but it’s about the same damn topic for the entire time.

Let’s say you’re both into working out, or restaurants, or hot rods for that matter. So you talk about this one-subject for 20 minutes. While at first, this seems like you’re building rapport, you’re shooting yourself in the foot pal. She’ll feel like you have nothing else to discuss afterwards and she won’t be too apt to meet you again. You may get a phone number, but she’ll most likely flake in this scenario.

Approaching Women Mistake 9 - Bad Breath

OK, I know you’re thinking, “Oh come on Cameron! Are you really going to mention the obvious?” Yes! Because you’d be surprised how many people walk around with bad breath. And if I can’t stand it, imagine how she feels. While you’re trying be suave, she’d be looking for a fire escape.

Approaching Women Mistake 10 - Being Overly Nervous

This is the # 1 Mistake. Sorry fellas, being nervous is not attractive. While there may be a few girls here and there who find it cute, most women want a confident man. I don’t care what the pop psychologists or “Experts” on the radio and TV tell you, being nervous and fidgety is unattractive.

(Disclaimer: even confident men experience a bit of nervous energy, or a rush, and that’s OK.)

I am talking about being a nervous wreck that is very apparent. This will kill your chances faster than showing up in a job interview drunk and topless. The good news is that you can do something about it. The biggest mistake men make is to try and be macho because they don’t want to admit to themselves that perhaps they can use a bit of help in this area.

Once upon a time, I really didn’t know what to say upon approaching a beautiful woman. Finally, I decided to do something about it. In fact, I became so obsessed with it that I learned from everyone I could and I teach this stuff!

Now I walk into social venues with men and teach them how to meet women right there live and in person. You may not ever want to be a teacher in this field, but you owe it to yourself in learning how to approach and ATTRACT Women better. Yes, it can be learned. Yes, it’s possible. Yes, you can learn to become more confident and skilled.

Click here to read about my Building Attraction Secrets ebook. You’ll find specific guidelines on proper body language that will you attract women, a comprehensive section on what to say, how to say it, and what to avoid saying to a woman upon approaching, and much much more...

Cameron Teone is a highly regarded trainer of Natural Approach and Real World Game, and the author of the no-holds-barred how-to dating guide for men called Building Attraction Secrets. He has worked with David DeAngelo of Double Your Dating fame, and during the infamous Project Hollywood days, also assisted Mystery with his Mystery Method workshops. He's also a frequent contributor on various Pickup Community audios and podcasts, including Scot Mckay.